


I'll find a way

by darksquall



Category: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VIII, Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Angst, M/M, Potions, Potions as Lube, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 00:41:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21808393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darksquall/pseuds/darksquall
Summary: Cloud has a habit of wandering off and Leon never knows when he's going to come back.Just a moody sometime around KH2 ficlet of Leon and Cloud and sex.
Relationships: Cloud/Leon (Kingdom Hearts)
Kudos: 61





	I'll find a way

**Author's Note:**

> Still going through some old stories and this one was finished so I figured why not. 
> 
> My Leon definitely came from the FF8 world. Whether he replaced a different Squall, took over the body or whatever, he has all the FF8 parts of him still in tact. Probably why he's so messed up.

The kitchen door creaked open slowly.

Leon froze where he was standing at the counter, not even moving his head to see whom had dared to encroach on his personal space without even knocking. His first thought was to his gunblade, safely stowed away for the night in its ebony and silver case upstairs. It was Yuffie’s night to be on call, so he’d made the mistake of stowing his weapon early, thinking he wouldn’t need it again.

“Hey,” Cloud’s voice was soft and cautious as he lingered in the doorway.

With a soft sigh of almost relief, Leon glanced over his shoulder. The door was still open, allowing a cool breeze to blow into the kitchen. He couldn’t help but scowl faintly at the swordsman, though he was once again in less than mint condition. It had been so long since they’d last spoken, so long since the young man had even deigned to grace Leon with his presence that Leon had already been wondering if he’d died. Cloud seemed to be as hard to kill as he himself was though, and he always turned up sooner or later.

Still, Leon couldn’t help but worry about him. “Do I know you?” he asked, setting the knife he’d been holding down on the counter...

“Leon, don’t be like that,” Cloud said, his voice taking on a faintly annoyed tone. Still, he didn’t attempt to take another step into the kitchen without permission. And the more Leon looked at Cloud, the more tired he seemed.

Finally, Leon turned away, returning to his task. “Come in and close the door if you’re coming in. Don’t just _stand_ there.”

Distantly relieved and smiling in that soft, quiet way that he had, Cloud stepped inside. He paused only long enough to close the door behind him and lock it. “How long has it been?” he asked, unbuckling the sheath of his sword slowly. The movement of his long, pale fingers caught Leon’s attention and he watched out of the corner of his eye, wondering where Cloud’s gloves were. He rarely fought without them – his swords were heavy and awkward to use. The gloves minimised the calluses and he never had time to pull them on before someone tried to kill him.

“Two months. Glad I don’t junction any more. I really might have forgotten you if I still had Shiva plugged into my head,” Leon replied. He kept his words careful, an even tone because even if he was angry, there was nothing that he could do about it. And he was angry, angry that Cloud saw fit to leave for such long periods of time, that he was so focused on his obsession with Sephiroth that everyone, even his closest friends faded in comparison. “Are you staying for dinner?”

Cloud looked thoughtful, his gaze cast down at the floor. He still lingered at the edges of the room, as though he were afraid to come any closer. Afraid to incur Leon’s wrath. “If you’ll have me. Why aren’t you eating with Aerith tonight?”

Leon turned to face his friend again, fully this time. “I can only take so much Yuffie per month. This is for her safety and my sanity.”

Usually, his Yuffie limit was reached on the first day but he tried to be social for Aerith’s sake, if nothing else.

With a half smile, Cloud edged closer. At long last he was close enough for Leon to grab him by the wrist and hall him close enough to inspect. Other than a graze on his cheek, he seemed fine, but his clothes would hide wounds from Leon’s searching hands. There would be time to inspect him properly later. Brushing his thumb over the graze – a nasty looking wound but barely deep enough to scar Cloud’s skin – Leon sighed. “Out of potions again?”

With a faint nod, Cloud nuzzled against the hand that cupped his cheek. “I have been for a week or so. I didn’t realise how long I’d been away.”

“And you’re too scared of Aerith to go back like this,” Leon finished for him, voicing the words that Cloud would not speak. He shook his head in dismissal – he would be just the same if he were the one to still be lost and wandering. Then he brushed his lips over Cloud’s lightly. “You know where I keep my stash, help yourself.”

“Give me a minute,” His fingers tight in Leon’s shirt, and his blue eyes firmly locked with Leon’s, Cloud didn’t move an inch just yet. “You missed me,” he breathed.

Sliding his hand into Cloud’s hair to cup the back of his head, Leon was the first to move as usual. He didn’t even reply to the half whisper, even though he really had missed the blond swordsman. Every time he disappeared off on one of his futile searches and, as Yuffie had termed them, “wild Sephiroth chases”, Leon missed him.

Besides, he was a good fuck.

He kissed Cloud properly, a soft careful kiss that made the blond shiver faintly – he never seemed to get used to Leon treating him with care and tenderness. Maybe that was why Leon always found himself going through the same motions, always beginning carefully and cautiously until he couldn’t resist any more.

This time however, Cloud had been away longer than ever. He didn’t know how long either of them would be able to resist the baser desires and urges.

He soon found out that it wouldn’t be long at all.

Cloud wrapped one arm around Leon’s waist, tugging his shirt from beneath the leather that kept it in check. His fingers brushed along the waistband of Leon’s pants and dipped beneath the edge, ghosting over the pale skin that had remained hidden beneath thick black leather and wide belts with a soft sound.

Leon couldn’t quite place it. Not quite lust or need, just a soft little hum. Perhaps it was satisfaction.

Forcing Cloud to walk backwards, he urged him to the counter top and trapped him against it to pull the zipper of his sweater down just far enough to bare his throat. Attacking the newly exposed skin with relish, he licked and bit at the newly exposed skin, pausing just below the ear that bore the wolf earring for a moment.

When he did, Cloud took his chance to unfasten Leon’s belts, one after the other. His fingers fumbled with the heavy leather and thick steel buckles clumsily in his haste, his breath coming in short, hot gasps against Leon’s ear.

Finally, with the last belt open, Cloud popped the button of his fly and dragged the zip down slowly.

Pulling back to watch Cloud’s intense blue eyes, Leon almost growled with need. The glitter of Mako energy gave those eyes a haunting quality unlike any other, a distracting sense of power and danger. The only eyes Leon had ever seen to even compare were those belonging to Sephiroth.

Leon brushed Cloud’s hand away from the tauntingly light touch it had on his stomach, close to the already hard arc of his sex and crouched in front of him. Unlacing the heavy motorcycle boots, he had to make an effort to ignore the spots of blood still littering the black leather. Dried to dark brown, it was old blood and to reach there it had to belong to Cloud himself. His reach would keep anyone else far enough away to avoid staining his clothing.

Almost anyone anyway.

Leon tugged Cloud’s pants down and inched back up his body, kissing his skin and nibbling at him just often enough to have his blond lover arching to him for more.

“Potion?” Cloud murmured, his fingers threading into Leon’s hair as he lapped at a nipple.

He had one left in his belt, just enough for a reunion. It would have to do, Leon didn’t particularly want to have to let go of Cloud now he was finally sure he was real and he didn’t feel like trying something more adventurous no matter how menacingly the bottle of olive oil on the counter loomed.

He poured just enough of the potion over his fingers. The blue green glow flared briefly as it searched out injury, settling into a muted glow when it found none. Leon slid his hand between cloud’s legs, teasing his opening lightly and finally pushing two fingers into him slowly.

Cloud’s whole body flexed, arching to get away from the touch at first until he was balanced on his toes, resting his back against the counter. And then he drove himself down onto Leon’s fingers, half whimpering.

Permitting his lover to move for a moment, just to feel the friction of his touch, Leon bowed his head to kiss Cloud’s bare chest. He nosed the thick sweater aside, lapping lightly at one of his nipples. With the flesh hardening against his tongue, Leon chose the moment to drive his fingers deep into Cloud carefully, biting into the hardened flesh.

The cry Cloud gave was worth it. Deep, husky and needing – the potion took away any edge of pain the press of fingers inside him had offered, leaving only the minor sting of Leon’s teeth to act in counter point to the pleasure.

Leon repeated his action again, and again, listening to Cloud’s cries grow more and more desperate before he finally released him. Stepping back, meeting Cloud’s hot gaze, Leon slicked his cock with the remains of his potion slowly. This was just sex. There was no love in it that would come later. Perhaps a little of it at least, was some sort of punishment or at least a remainder of what Cloud missed every time he disappeared again.

It wouldn’t stop him, but maybe it would bring him back sooner next time.

“Leon,” Cloud murmured cautiously. He was still leaning back against the counter heavily, his legs spread and his hard cock arcing to his bare belly. With his cheeks flushed and his lips barely parted he looked too good to resist a moment longer.

Though he didn’t say a word, Leon coaxed his lover into leaning back even further. He lifted Cloud’s legs to wrap around his waist and to make him rely on Leon’s strength alone to keep him safe. It may not have been about love yet, but it was certainly about trust.

Slowly, he pushed into Cloud, rocking his hips with the most insignificant little movements, only serving to drive himself deeper at a maddeningly unhurried pace.

Mako ringed blue eyes still barely open, Cloud watched his lover, just rocking his hips in slow circles. The friction, delicious and dizzying was enough to keep his words at bay, the only appreciation he could offer being a moan, a whimper, a gasp of pleasure…

Even as he held Cloud, Leon watched avidly as Cloud’s body flexed between himself and the counter. The way his belly tensed and his shoulders shivered, every reaction enchanting and beautiful but completely involuntary. Leon loved him. He couldn’t help it anymore, despite the disappearances, the fact he’d always be living in the shadow of whomever Cloud had loved before, Leon loved him. Probably too much.

With Cloud still precariously balanced between Leon and the counter, still trusting Leon to support him, Leon began to fuck him. Deep, hard strokes that had Cloud panting desperation all too soon.

Even if he did want to remind his lover of what he’d missed, Leon could hardly deny him pleasure.

“Squall,” Cloud gasped, shuddering as he spilled over his own belly without warning, struggling to remain in place.

Leon couldn’t find the breath to correct him, nor the energy to care. All his senses were encompassed by Cloud – the way his body tightened around Leon’s sex and the deep guttural moan that accompanied his orgasm were too much for him and he came, muffling his cries against his lover’s bare chest.

When he’d finally caught his breath, Leon slid out of Cloud and helped him to find his feet again. Still dizzy, he kissed his lover, softly over and over until he just couldn’t anymore. He stood stock still, resting his forehead on Cloud’s shoulder – now he felt guilty for wanting to punish him and he couldn’t make himself let go of his lover.

“Leon?”

Taking a moment to compose himself, he nodded in response to the concerned little whisper of his name. “Come on,” he said. Cloud followed him obediently to the bed, shedding what little of his clothing remained before slumping back onto the rather worn bedcovers. “I’m going to finish up – want anything?”

His only answer was a delicate shake of the spiky blond head that he effectively ignored.

Returning to the kitchen just long enough to make a cup of coffee for each of them and a snack, he found Cloud already dozing lightly by the time he got back. “Cloud?” he ventured gently.

“I’m awake,” Cloud murmured, even though he very clearly wasn’t. His eyes were still closed and his expression as close to peaceful as Leon had ever seen it. That quickly changed when Leon sat beside him. He started, sitting upright and taking a few deep breaths to calm himself.

“You’re on edge,” Leon said, exercising his great talent for the blatantly obvious.

Shrugging it off as though it didn’t matter, Cloud eyed the mugs in Leon’s hand. “Coffee?”

“If it’s the only chance I have of keeping you awake, why not?”

With a half smile, Cloud took the mug and rested it on the bedspread beside him. “Did I miss anything important?” he asked softly, watching the steam rise from the hot liquid and curl lazily through the air.

Leon stretched and turned to face his lover. He was beginning to feel the effects of the day himself. “Just Yuffie’s ‘How will Cloud be injured this time’ betting pool.”

With a longsuffering, dramatic sigh that even the young ninja girl would have been proud of, Cloud took his first sip of the strong drink. Of course he pulled a face – Leon always made it too strong for him and Cloud invariably added more sugar. “Leon..?”

He offered another cube of sugar, receiving a smile when Cloud took it. He knew Cloud entirely too well, which was what made it all the harder to accept it every time Cloud left because he knew that his lover wouldn’t change. Not as long as he kept chasing shadows and whispers, and the ghosts of his own past.

For a while, Leon watched Cloud drink, still tired enough to almost be falling asleep in his mug. “You called me that name again.”

“Sorry,” he murmured on reflex. They all knew how badly Squall wanted to leave that name, that world and that life behind him yet they still insisted on calling it him every now and then. This time had been a slip of the tongue, at least, that was easier to forgive. The memories and regrets that came with it would not be dismissed easily though.

“What happened this time?”

Cloud paused for a moment, his blue eyes staring into space as though he were having to search for the answer himself. Just when Leon was about to wave a hand in front of his face to check he was awake, he shook his head. “I caught up with him once.”

“Just once?”

“Yeah,” Cloud set the mug on the bedside table, leaning back on his hands. “I didn’t realise I’d been away that long, this time.”

“Is it always going to be like this?” Leon wondered aloud. He almost flinched when Cloud rested his hand on his thigh, almost but not quite.

Cloud instead edged closer, resting his forehead against the side of Leon’s head for a moment. He sighed one of those tired sighs, not quite sure of the answer himself. Leon knew that but he had to ask, had to make the swordsman face up to that fact. “Not always, I promise.”

It wasn’t a lie, but it might as well have been. Leon nodded in response but couldn’t ignore the hollow, empty feeling it left inside him. At least they had a few hours for each other, at least they had tonight. Hunger long forgotten, Leon turned to embrace Cloud, holding him tightly. He wanted Cloud to remember that hug and what it meant but it would pale to that need for revenge in Cloud’s heart. Leon would always be secondary in his life as long as Sephiroth lived.

Sometimes he hated that man more than Cloud did.

Leon allowed Cloud to coax him back until they were resting against the pillows together. It took a little maneuvering to pull the covers around them both and when they succeeded they both fell silent again. Neither of them had ever been the type to make small talk.

After a while, Cloud’s fingers traced down his back, following Leon’s spine and darting away to follow a scar just before they reached the cleft of his ass. Still it had been close enough to make Leon shiver. “Again?” he asked, his tone deliberately light.

“Again.”

Shaking his head, Leon half chuckled at the commanding edge to Cloud’s voice. “I thought you were tired,” he murmured softly, shifting to lie beside Cloud once again, face to face. “Is there something wrong?”

“Of course not,” Cloud brushed his fingers along Leon’s cock lightly before he encircled it loosely.

Pausing for just a moment, Leon matched him, closing his eyes. There was something, and whatever it was, he didn’t think he’d like it very much. Cloud would tell him in his own time and there wasn’t anything he could do about it, except give him what he wanted tonight and hope it was enough.

Stroking Cloud slowly, matching his pace, Leon closed his eyes. He could smell motorbike oil and leather on his lover’s skin, just faintly, and behind it the iron tang of blood. He’d had to close his eyes to catch it, taste it in the air. A wound that should have bought him back sooner. He tried to forget that it hadn’t, and kissed Cloud, nipping at his lips sharply enough to make him gasp.

“Fuck,” he groaned, rolling his hips to thrust into Leon’s waiting hand.

Sliding his fingers into Cloud’s hair to force him into tilting his head just so, Leon watched his eyes flutter closed. His fair eyelashes rested on his skin like a dusting of gold and his lips parted in a sweet moan as Leon tightened his fingers around the hard arc of his cock. “Like that?” he half gasped, half whispered as his own pleasure threatened to consume him.

“Yes…,” Cloud husked, shuddering against him, his free hand finding and tightening on Leon’s shoulder. “Leon!”

Cloud came first, bucking against Leon as he growled his lover’s name, his body growing rigid for a few moments. Then he returned to stroking Leon, even as he was panting with the little after shocks of pleasure that lit along his veins. He slowed his movements deliberately, sliding his arm around Leon’s shoulders to hold him close.

Every tug of Leon’s sex, every shift of Cloud’s hot hand against his sensitive skin drew another moan, whimper, hiss of pleasure from him. He couldn’t find his voice anymore, focusing on Cloud and just rocking into his hand but every time he tried to move faster, Cloud slowed him down deliberately.

He had to wait until Cloud decided to let him come. This was his turn to prove something to himself and Leon had no idea what it was. They were both fucked up, both chasing shadows and dreams that would likely always be out of their reach and until they’d caught or dismissed those destructive desires, neither of them would be happy. Not with themselves, or each other.

Leon cried as he came, letting Cloud hold him.

In the silence that followed, it didn’t take long for Leon to drift off. The warmth of Cloud’s body against his own, the comfort of having his lover there at long last lulled him to sleep.

********

Leon stirred reluctantly. He was warm, still sleepy and the thought of rising to greet Aerith and Yuffie for breakfast was not one he relished. As such, he lingered a while longer, dozing.

The sound of the bedroom door opening roused him, making him rub his eyes and sit up. Cloud had paused there when Leon had moved, his head hanging at being caught. "Go back to sleep," he said softly. "It's still early."

The swordsman was already half dressed - his pauldron held in his hand for him to slip on later. The heavy belts would have woken him sooner, Leon was sure that was why he was in his current state. Leon had woken anyway, fortunately for him. "You're leaving again already?"

"Only for a few days, this time. I'll be back soon, I promise."

"You said that last time and I didn't see you for months," Leon scowled for a moment and sighed, rubbing the scar over the bridge of his nose. It took a few moments to calm himself again, despite only just waking he was alert and all too aware that he would have to deal with the aftermath of Cloud's disappearance _again._ When he was able to set his anger aside enough to speak, he shook his head. "What should I tell the girls? and Cid?"

With no reason to keep quiet any more, Cloud positioned the pauldron on his shoulder and strapped it into place. He couldn't quite look at Leon, his gaze always falling a few inches above his head or on the floor at his own feet. He knew how much he was disappointing his friend and lover. "A few days and I'll explain it to them myself."

Leon stood slowly, crossing to Cloud to kiss him softly. "You have a week," he whispered, resting his forehead against Cloud's. He closed his eyes to steel himself for a moment, then forced a smile. "And if you're not back then, I'll come after you."

"You can't, you know that."

"I'll find a way."

Cloud kissed him, hands sliding over Leon's bare back and down to his ass to hold him close. Leon sighed into his waiting mouth, then pulled away, returning to the bed. It was early, he could at least grab another hour's sleep - if he could even get back to sleep - without too much trouble and the urge to hide from the girls was always an overwhelming presence in the back of his mind.

"Leon...," Cloud began, but stopped himself. Whatever he had been about to say was lost as he turned and with a rattle of belts and a whisper of black leather, he was gone. Leon counted the seconds until he heard the kitchen door to his small home creak open and slam closed again, hard enough to rattle the window downstairs.

He knew what Cloud had wanted to say, but there hadn't been time to say it and, angry as he was, Leon hadn't wanted to hear it. He rolled onto his side, drawing the blankets over himself again and glowered at the pillow where Cloud's head had been until just a short time ago. Every time he left, every time he disappeared, that hollow feeling returned to Leon's heart. No matter how often it happened, there was always that lingering loneliness that he couldn't ignore. Sometimes it felt too much. Sometimes he wondered if it were worth the heartache, and the anger and everything that Cloud's always brief presence bought to him.

He closed his eyes.

"Whatever."


End file.
